The Book About Itself

Craig Morey
23 April 2019


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"So it's a book?"

"More like an essay or a short story, really. It's not very long."

"'Queen on her own color,' remember? You're playing White, so the queen goes on the white square."

"Oh, right. Sorry."

"..."

"..."

"So what's it about?"

"The book?"

"Yeah."

"Well, it's about itself, mostly."

"How does that work?"

"The whole thing's a dialogue. It's basically a transcript of two people having a conversation about a book, and the book they're talking about is about those same two people having that exact conversation."

"And the whole thing is just the two of them talking?"

"Yeah. Well, they're also playing chess. That's what made me think of it just now."

"Huh. Interesting."

"..."

"..."

"What the hell was that??"

"What?"

"You can't take my pawn like that! It wasn't even on that square!"

"Oh. It's called '/en passant/.' Look it up."

"I swear you're making that up."

"Look it up."

"Fine."

"..."

"..."

"What was the book called? Or the short story or whatever it is."

"Oh, uh, it's just called 'The Book About Itself', actually."

"Is it actually any good? It sounds like it would be kind of boring."

"It's really short though. I don't know, it was interesting I guess? I read it a while ago."

"..."

"That leaves your bishop wide open."

"So take it, then."

"Wait. Hold on, let me think."

"Take your time."

"..."

"So, in the book, do the characters ever realize that the book they're talking about is about them?"

"No."

"Huh. That might have been interesting."

"They do talk about it, though."

"What?"

"In the book, part of the conversation is about whether or not the characters in the book realize that they're the ones in the book."

"Oh, huh. Neat."

"..."

"Isn't that a little weird though, that they would talk about it but still not realize that they're the ones in the book?"

"Yeah, I guess so. I don't really remember it all that well, I read it a while ago."

"..."

"..."

"Check."

"...Damn."

"It's not checkmate."

"Give me a second."

"You have to block with the knight, that's your only move."

"Ok, yeah, I see it now."

"..."

"..."

"So in the book, who wins the chess match?"

"Um, Black, I think."

"Huh."

"..."

"Well hey, what do you know. Checkmate."


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